My little LouLou started Kindergarten today. Now millions of parents have done this, but for me its a first. What makes it so hard is I work less than 100 feet from her school. In fact when I open the door by my desk and look out side, her room is on the other side of the window I look at.
I dropped her off at Preschool three years ago, and the crying was terrible. Grace was pretty upset too. She cried every morning for three months, and when I came to pick her up, she was crying because other parents had picked their kid up and I hadn't shown up. This morning, she was running down the sidewalk all excited. She found her spot in the gym, hugged her mother about 5 times, and seemed to be nervous, but very excited. At the time (40 minutes ago as I write this) I was fine. Now. . . my little LouLou is not so little.
Side: A few months ago I started calling her LouLou when I would do a Yogi Bear impersonation . . .she in turn started calling me BooBoo.
Today's going to be hard. I know it only gets harder. This week she wouldn't let me take her to the bathroom at a restaurant. She went to the girls room by herself. That was hard on me, on her . . ehh. I never wanted to be a father . . now I can't imagine not having my little girl in my life. I can't imagine her not telling me I need to go to preschool because I can't count properly. (I mess up on purpose) ( Really, I do)
I can't imagine her telling me about how I need to recycle so I won't fill up all the landfills. I can't imagine her not giving me the look she gives me when I give her one of my crazy answers. I can't imagine her not telling me she loves me so so much.
I know little girls grow up and become big girls, then young ladies, and then women. I knew this was going to happen. I just didn't know I wasn't ready for it. Love you LouLou.
Ok, that's it for today . . I'm going to hunt down some Kleenex. . .only 6 hours and 10 minutes until I can go get her. . . .pray for me today, I'm gonna need it. . til next time . . when ever that is.